Ana-Maria Dias was from her very first days on the planet a powerful spirit full of energy and self determination. She was an intellectual, with deep curiosities, a never-ending drive to understand truth, and interests in topics ranging from design to mechanism to mind. She was ever interested in helping others, and often did so with impressive investments in efforts on behalf of people and organizations. She was known to always be available to help, and to share her reflections and insights. She was the best best friend someone could ever hope to have in a best friend. She was a close sister to her two sisters and brother and just as close a sister to her nieces and nephews.
Ana-Maria was the consummate hostess, who loved bringing out plate after plate of food. She dedicated hours to volunteering in her daughters’ schools. And, gifted with an eye for the artistic, she staged her own house for sale, and then reused the pieces she bought to stage the old house in her new home with stunning results.
Ana-Maria, a devoted mother and community volunteer, died along with her husband and two daughters in a car accident while vacationing in Kootenay National Park, British Columbia, Canada. She was 50.
Ana-Maria was born January 1, 1961 on S. Jorge, in the Azores Islands. When she was just a year old, her father, who had traveled to the United States to find work, became ill and her mother traveled there to care for him. Dias, who was left in the care of her aunt, spent years separated from her parents. “I think that really instilled a strength in her,” says her niece, Carla Francisco.
The family eventually moved back and forth between the Azores and the former Portuguese colony of Angola. When Ana-Maria was a teenager, Angola was in the midst of a civil war. Ana-Maria’s sister-in-law, Cindy Howard, remembers Ana-Maria telling her that she was alone with her father when the fighting came to within a mile of their home. Ana-Maria’s father told her that she had just an hour to decide what they would take when they fled. They never saw that house again.
She came to the United States and the family settled in California’s Napa Valley. Dias finished high school and then went to California State University, San Luis Obispo, where she earned a degree in Electronic Engineering. Her first job after graduating was as an engineer at the American Rocket Company, an early startup in the realm of commercial rocketry. As a rocket scientist, she was entrusted with the responsibility for making decisions about the post-launch destruction of the experimental rockets being developed by the company should there be a failure. Following her work as a rocket engineer and rocketry entrepreneur, she worked in the realm of electronics, including a long-term position with Philips Semiconductor.
Her true loves were always books, art, and learning new things about people and the world. It was not out of the ordinary to see Ana Maria porting a large book on human psychology or models of cognition, and talking with her family and friends about the wonders of the functioning of the brain—and with excitement and a twinkle in the eye—mention, “wouldn’t that be a wonderful thing to pursue these ideas in graduate school, and do research to learn new things how the brain works.” Even while pursuing her interest in electronics, Ana-Maria’s love of books led her to taking a part-time position at a bookstore, helping people with finding books. She kept up on her pursuit of learning, and even while mothering, took additional postgraduate courses in architectural design, taking out time to build beautiful scale models of structures she reflected about building one day.
It was that sort of intellectual curiosity that was a source of attraction for Robert Howard, the Palo Alto-raised engineer she met at a party in 1995. Howard was smitten, but Ana-Maria was involved with someone else. The next time they met, though, she was again single and a romance began. “It was quite a match,” says Howard’s sister, Kim Saxe. “He hit gold with this one.” She was a true soul mate for Robert. On camping trips, the couple sometimes brought along a dictionary, looked up words, and engaged in passionate discussions about them.
Their daughter Samantha, who went by Sam, was born in 1999, followed two years later by Veronica, who everyone called Nica.
With the birth of her daughters, Ana-Maria explored new passions. She actively participated in local parenting communities, starting with her attendance at Palo Alto’s PreSchool Family beginning when Sam was a baby. She went on to be an active volunteer at El Carmelo Elementary School and Jane Lathrop Stanford Middle School, where her girls were students. She was active in Partners in Education, which raises money to support the Palo Alto schools. Dias was particularly proud of starting an art fair at El Carmelo, where artists could share and sell their works.
Ana-Maria was also in the early stages of beginning her own business as a professional organizer, which incorporated her love for the aesthetic. Her sister-in-law, Saxe, says Ana-Maria’s own home was “phenomenal,” with a striking color scheme that included bright greens, ruby, purple and gold.
Ana-Maria is survived by her parents, Jose and Natalia Dias of Turlock; her brother John and his wife Teresa of Turlock; her sister Mary Horvitz and her husband Eric; and her sister Natalia Moore and her husband Jim. She is also survived by nieces and nephews, Carlo Dias and his girlfriend Samantha and Nicholas Dias, Carla Francisco, Andrea Francisco, and Zachary Horvitz, Lana and Leah Moore, as well as a grand-niece, Taylor Dias.
Ana Maria,
You were an amazing person, always active and present for everyone.
We will miss you so so much.
With all our love
Patricia, Philippe, Adrien and Sandra
Ana-Maria,
you were such a great friend and special person…I am very sorry I didn’t have the opportunity to tell you. You inspired me and understood me. Thank you friend, I will miss you!
What a horrible tragedy. You were an amazing woman with endless energy. We will miss all of you.
Ana-Maria was such an organized and helpful person for us to have around the office. We were incredibly lucky to have her as a second mother to us all.
We, and the JLS and El Carmelo communities will miss you, Robert, Sam and Nica so much.
Kieran
You are a great woman! You made me a better person. I am so saddened by this tragic loss to our community. My thoughts and prayers go out to your family. Mr. Robert, Sam and Nica you will be truly missed by all.
What a tragedy, my heart goes out to family and friends.
Ana Maria, you were my good friend. You taught me so much about friendship and life. You hosted my bridal shower, listened to me when I was agonizing over toddler issues, and gave me your extra carseats. I so looked forward to seeing you at the end of the summer so you can share more mommy tips with me. I will miss you. I cherish our time together. I will also cherish your memory.
Ana-Maria:
It is true that “all the world’s a stage,” but you were so much more than merely a player to your family, your friends, and to all the communities in which you participated. Our friendship began with that amazing crocodile costume you designed and made, and continued when you agreed to offer your support/creativity/laughter as co-producer for the next El Carmelo theatre production. It was most recently strengthened by a three-hour chat over coffee; I am now so grateful to have had that time with you to catch up and to brainstorm about the future. While no one can dispute that men and women all have “their exits and their entrances,” surely none are as untimely as this.
You and your beautiful family will remain in my thoughts always.
Ana-Maria,
Though we met only briefly, your kindness left a lasting impression on me. I won’t forget your friendly demeanors.
We are so sad for your loss and our prayers and thoughts are with your family. You left phissicaly but your sprit is still among us.
Ana-Maria,
The El Carmelo community will miss you so much. Thank-you for all that you have done. Our hearts go out to your family and friends.
We will always remember the kindness that you shows us coming to the El Camelo School family. We met each other when our children were in Kindergarten.
You always supported the school function and activities!
Thanks you, you will be missed!!!
Ana-Maria,
We are deeply saddened by this news to the El Carmelo community. We met briefly through the school auction but I remember your dedication to the event and how you went out of your way to help everyone. Your kindness and smile will be remembered. We will miss you. Our hearts go out to your family.
Ana-Maria:
We first met when Sam and Nicolas had classes together at Pre-School Family. Then Nica and Amanda went through the program together. Both times our families gravitated toward each other and shared so many wonderful experiences. I have so many fond memories of play dates and birthday parties shared with you and your family. I was always amazed by your creativity and great sense of humor. You and your family will be dearly missed.
Anamaria: I have known you since Sam was 5 months old from preschool family. Our daughters bonded right from the beginning and so did we. My family has so many wonderful memories with your family.
I will miss your smiling face. Robert’s witty humour, Sam’s wonderful effervescent spirit, and Nica’s beautiful kind soul.
It was truly a privilege to have known you and your family.
Ana Maria,
Your dedication to volunteering at El Carmelo was a true inspiration! I always looked forward to our Merchant Committee meetings at Cafe Sophia & Starbucks with you & Shirley to help bring in donations for El Carmelo’s Auction a couple of years ago. You seemed to have endless energy & enthusiasm. I only hope you knew how much you were loved and appreciated. This is a huge tragic loss for El Carmelo and I will miss you! My deepest condolences go out to your loved ones.
Ana-Maria-
I will miss seeing your sweet smiling face at school, whether is was a quick pass by or some major school event, you always took time to talk a little and always had some new event to share… I will forever miss our crafting together or going over plans for school events. I continue to see you at your home behind your counter, making sure you had enough scones to go around or making more tea, for volunteering mothers. I will miss bumping into you at school and seeing your smiling face. We will all miss you so so much my dear friend.Thanks for always being so carrying and inviting Marion too all your fun events! Love always Dee & Marion Rehbock
Ana-Maria and her family will be greatly missed.We were so sad to hear of the tragic loss of their entire family. Ana-Maria brought so much to the children and families she came in contact with. We first met them at a photo shoot with Sam. Although Sam was a grade ahead of my daughter, Marissa, from then on she was so sweet and kind to her. We will have fond memories of all the many auction events Ana-Maria held: Yearly Christmas craft-making, Father daughter dance and the most recent JLS private tour with Sam. Our thoughts are prayers are with their family and friends.
Elizabeth, Kenny and Marissa
Although I knew him only briefly at Lunar, Robert’s exceptional talent and character were obvious from the very first moment. Our family is much like Robert’s and Ana Maria’s, with girls the same age. We feel for their families and for the whole Lunar family also. It is beyond sad that this has happened. Mark, Elizabeth Monroe, Emilee and Elissa.
Ana-Maria, Sam and Nica
I feel so blessed to have spent time in the pool with both your
sweet girls. Thank you for the memories I will forever hold dear to
my heart.
Louise Feeley
To the dear families of Ana-Maria, Robert, Sam & Nica: We are so very, very sorry for your loss. We met Ana-Maria, Robert and girls through Preschool Family and have great memories of adventurous play dates with Sam and Nica, and great discussions with Robert and Ana-Maria. It was our good fortune to meet and spend time with such happy, caring people. We will always remember them. Maria Morgan & Rich McCauley, and Kaelyn age 12
I’m still in shock. We never want to believe this could happen to such a wonderful family. Ana Maria, I miss you so much. It’s been years since I’ve seen you but that never will lessen the bond of friendship that we shared. We had the best times together in college and later with your family. You will be deeply missed. My heart goes out to your whole family. I know how close you were and I cannot even comprehend their grief right now. May God watch over all and be there to help pick up the pieces from this tragic accident. I love you.
Dear Ana Maria,
I can’t fathom starting school without seeing Samantha’s sweet smile and your caring face. You’ve always been inspirational to me with your energy and can-do spirit. Thank you so much for being part of the lives of many of us at El Carmelo and JLS. I know your spirit will forever be with us in our thoughts.
Love
Cynthia
Dear Ana-Maria,
Your kindness, creativity and devotion to the school community and education inspire us all. It breaks my heart to even think about the fact that you are no longer with us. You were always there helping us whenever and whatever we needed and you were always there helping the children in their classrooms, on their field trips and school ground.
You had so many talents, so much energy and drive. And yet, you were so gracious, kind and caring. You will be forever missed and remembered.
Love,
Samantha
Ana Maria I will always remember what a sweet kind person you were and the many great times you, Susan Stewart, and I all had together while you were in here at Cal Poly. I will pray for all your family in helping with this tragic loss!
Love, Yvonne
What an inspiration your family has been to so many people. Any time that love and light can be shared it’s a gift and you clearly were very generous with your gifts. May your time with the Palo Alto community be a reminder to all to be more loving, more patient, more helpful and more generous to all those we encounter. I’m incredibly heartbroken to have only known you for a short time but blessed at getting see and experience your true kindness.
Nica & my daughter played on the same soccer team. Nica was the sweetest, nicest child & my daughter adored her! Ana-Maria was a welcoming, smiling face I’ll always remember – so warm and inclusive and helpful to kids and parents alike! Ana-Maria was also a heartfelt volunteer on Project Cornerstone – she strived to protect other families from tragedy, and I know that I am just one voice in this whole community that is so deeply saddened now that we are facing the tragedy of losing this loving family. I also knew Ana-Maria through PiE – working to give all our children a chance to have a good education. Her brilliant, giving spirit will always live on in our hearts and minds.
What a terrible loss! My heart goes out to Ana Maria’s family and friends. At El Carmelo I helped her set up for the fabulous auctions she chaired. She had such attention for detail, and she made everyone feel valued. I will miss her smile, her generosity of spirit and her positive attitude. She certainly made a big impact at El Carmelo. We’ll all miss this wonderful family.
Ana-Maria, Sam, and NIca…..
We had the great pleasure and honor working with you all at our dental office…. and had fun watching Sam playing softball those few times at Cubberley……
We will miss you all……..
Gregory Ding
Ana-Maria..
You were an amazing person. Thank you so much for welcoming me into the family with your open arms. Im so blessed to have known you in my life. Thank you for your great advices and for being so encouraging. You are truly loved and going to be missed dearly.. we love you
My deepest condolences go out to all the family. I always felt a special bond with Ana-Maria because my father’s family also came from the Azores. She was a delight to know and to work with. What a devastating loss.
Ana-Maria,
You are an amazing and beautiful person and you helped me so much throughout my years at el carmelo. It Is such a tragedy that you and your family had to go but your spirit will always live on. I wish you were here to see how much everyone misses your kind heart and dedication to everything you do. God bless you and rest in peace! <3
Love always,
Erika
My GOD bless everyone and be at Peace.
Ana-Maria,
You were such a lovely, caring, smart, creative, fun, and positive person…what a tragic loss. I loved your unique style and always felt so comfortable around you. You were very real person–a quality that seems so rare these days. I admired you greatly. The love that you and Robert shared for each other was quite apparent and was reflected in your girls. You were just great to be around. Although I have not seen you in a few years, when I thought of you it always brought a smile to my face. I wish I had called you all of those times I wanted to but never did….I am so sorry now. The world is a little less bright today…but I know you would prefer people to smile and spread more sunshine around. So we will try. You set a good example of this when you were alive. May you and your beautiful family be held in heavenly light now and always.
I was very shocked to hear what had happened. Ana Maria was my cousin. Even though i didn’t know her that well. I remember her as being a very kind, loving person, and a great listener. The last time i saw her was 2 yrs ago. I remember talking to the girls about animals. They were such a great and wonderful family. Our heart goes out to the rest of the family. You are all in our thoughts and prayers.
Ana Maria
I can’t believe you are gone. You were such a caring and wonderful person. A devoted mom and definitively a role model. You inspired more than one to be a better person. We will always remember your kindness with much love
Tania
I still can’t believe that you are no longer with us. It seemed yesterday that we were chatting around the schoolyard and you were smiling and told me that my daughter is a spit image of me. I remember the Halloween party you organized in the fall and you dressed like a Gypsy with the pot of dry ice to produce the mysterious atmosphere in the classroom. I also remember the conversations I had with Robert. I thanked him for taking time to read to the class twice a week.
We were so fortunate to have you as neighbors and we will miss you dearly. The magic spirit you left will forever stay in our hearts and in hearts of the El Carmelo kids.
May you in peace.
Fan (My daughter Sophia was in the same class as Nica in their 1st and 2nd grade)
I will miss your spirit of creativity and adventure. I will miss our dinners full of laughter, jokes and talk of family. You were an important part of my life-our lives intersecting in so many ways….our younger girls growing together in girl scouts and soccer and on play dates, our husbands bonding discussing politics, engineering, motorcycles, our older girls emerging as teens…..there is a void in my heart but memories of you I hope will help fill it with time..I raise a glass to you dear friend and wish you were here to share it with me.
Ana-Maria was such an amazing woman!
When Sam and Marcel were in plays together at El Carmelo and I had to somehow come up with costumes… it was you who jumped right in and made incredible things! Your generous and creative spirit was simply amazing. You touched so many lives and gave so much to our school communities. You’ve left an indelible mark in Palo Alto.
I only had a 9 word conversation you but you are an amazing person
Ana-Maria was at the heart of the El Carmelo community; she could often be found there, building relationships and working to make El Carmelo the best place it possibly could be. It is impossible to know the full extent to which she gave of herself to our community. She served tirelessly in innumerable ways, both as an outstanding leader, and as a dedicated behind-the-scenes worker when others took their turns at leadership; she had a passion for making things happen regardless of her role in a particular project. Following her service as PTA Executive Vice President and then PTA President, she chaired El Carmelo’s Auction two years in a row. In addition, among other things, she produced our School Play, chaired our International Dinner and Spaghetti Dinner, spearheaded the PTA involvement in the Kinder Interviews (now Kinder Visits), served as our eScrip Coordinator, initiated the El Carmelo Art Fair, inviting not only local artists but also El Carmelo students and alumni to participate, and volunteered to help with countless other tasks whenever and wherever she was needed. She shared her love of crafting with El Carmelo students during recess and after-school activities, and she and Robert both volunteered extensively in Sam’s and Veronica’s classrooms. She was a vigorous advocate for all of El Carmelo’s children. The changes she instituted at El Carmelo were significant and long-lasting. Her legacy inspires us to ask what we can do to improve our community.
As large as her volunteer contributions were though, Ana-Maria’s biggest gift to El Carmelo was herself. She was our treasured friend, and she will always have a place in our hearts because of her boundless energy and enthusiasm, her remarkable creativity, her wide-ranging curiosity and intellect, her friendliness and natural ability to make everyone feel welcome, and her willingness to listen and give good advice.
The El Carmelo community is the better for Ana-Maria having been a part of it. We will be forever grateful, and those of us who were lucky enough to have known her will not forget her.
We extend our heartfelt condolences to Ana-Maria’s and Robert’s families on their loss.
Dear Howard and Dias family,
I am so sorry about your family member’s deaths, and I wish you much sympathy and comfort. My daughter Rowan Lee was on Sam’s spring softball team with her. Their team won first place in the city championship, and the girls formed a strong bond with each other. We remember chatting with your family at the games and team socials, and many years ago Ana-Maria and I worked together at Printers Inc. Bookstore and Café. I am a writer, but I am not usually inspired to write poetry. I find that things that want to be written write themselves in my head until they make it onto paper or screen. This poem came to me needing to be written, so I’m sharing it with you.
Grief
by Elizabeth Lee
You long for your children and grandchildren, your sister and brother, your aunt and uncle, your nieces, your cousins, your friends, to still be alive. Their house and belongings hold memories. Their clothes, their books, their dishes, their toys. That favorite stuffed animal, and that hairbrush that has strands of her hair. Those things still hold their essence. When you hold them close, close your eyes, and breathe in their scent, you can believe for a moment that they’re still there, that they’re still alive.
There are no bounds to the emptiness, no limits to the pain.
What God would do this?
What God could do this?
You hope so much that they didn’t suffer.
They come to you in your dreams at night, only it isn’t a dream because it is too real, and you are too awake in your dream for it to be a dream. Because it really is them, coming to you. They speak without speaking, and their thoughts reach you as words. They’re okay now, they tell you, They are happy together and reading and playing and loving, and they’re okay, they tell you.
“Oh Ana-Maria, oh Rob, oh Sam, oh Nica! You’re back!!!” you cry. It was all a mistake, you think, and now they’re back! You murmur their names with your physical voice, and as you stir, the spell is broken and they vanish back into the ethers. . .
and when you awake the reality of the nightmare returns.
But is really was them, and they have brought you comfort. They are with God now, and she holds them in the palm of her hand.
Love,
Liz
I forgot to tell you also that Rowan’s team will be wearing patches sewn onto their uniforms that say “Sam, #6”, which was her uniform number, in Sam’s memory when they play in a tournament in San Diego next weekend.
Love,
Liz
I first met Ana-Maria when my daughter, Julia, was in Mrs. Chandler’s third grade class at El Carmelo with Samantha. Ana-Maria was PTA President that year, and she later recruited me to be the editor for the Carmeletter. Our family had recently moved to Palo Alto from New York, and Ana-Maria and her whole family were such welcoming friends to all of us. Her overwhelming energy was so contagious, and I will always be grateful for everything and everyone she introduced me to at El Carmelo. Over the next couple years, I continued to admire Ana-Maria’s hard work as the school’s Auction chair and in so many other activities. We now live in NY, but share in the grief with the El Carmelo community. Our heart-felt condolences go out to the Howard and Dias families.
Our very best regards, Maria Whealan and the Whealan family
When I asked my son what he thought of going to Jordan last year, he said he missed El Carmelo. When I asked him what he missed about it, he said he missed you, Ana Maria. For all of the wonderful students, teachers, and parents he met at El Carmelo, you left the greatest impression on him. You created a place for our kids to shine, to take risks, and to know that people cared about them. The world is a better place because of your boundless energy and relentless dedication to making childhood great! You will be truly missed.
I miss you so much Ana; it has been 3 weeks, and I still cannot believe you are all gone. I carry you with me, but sometimes it is not enough. I love you all, so much. I wanted to include the words I spoke at your memorial, if only to reach out somehow…..
When I thought about what to say about Ana Maria, I realized that if I talked about what she meant to me, it would probably resonate with everyone who knew her. She was such an honest, open person, just wholly herself.
Ana was 13 years older than I am; she was born January 1, 1961. She was my aunt, but she was also my sister and another mother. Most of all, she was my mentor and friend. When I was about 8, I would look forward to her visits from college so much that I could not stop smiling the whole day. My face would ache from smiling so much. She would visit and make my lunch and put little notes in my lunch box saying, “I love you.” She would hold my hand until I fell asleep at night, tell me funny stories, and build blanket forts with me.
When I was in high school, Ana Maria moved in with my mother, sister, and me. We were a house full of women; even the cats were female. We had one male dog, Scootchie, who I like to say ran away because the house was too full of estrogen! What I remember most from those days were just the feelings of security, love and fun whenever I was around her. Ana was in her late 20s at the time, and she and my sister, who was then 8 years old, would spend a lot of weekends going to garage sales just to look at and pick up random silly stuff, like a huge stuffed purple snake. They called that “garage sale-ing,” and they did it just for laughs, which was totally an Ana Maria thing to do.
After that, Ana moved to a cabin on the top of Montebello Road. She was working as an engineer at Phillips Semiconductors then, but she also worked at the bookstore Printers Inc, because she loved books so much. I think it was during that period of time that she met Robert, and I cannot remember a moment when I doubted that they would be together forever.
Ana was such a smart, curious person. She was always wanting to learn, and she would pass that knowledge to me, in the form of books or cds, whenever she could. She had no limit to her curiosity; in fact, she never saw limitations or obstacles in anything. Instead, she always saw challenges as things she could solve or fix. When she and Robert married and lived together in Palo Alto, she decided to redo the furniture, and that is what she did. She took furniture apart, reupholstered it, then put it back together, and it looked professional. She told me that she learned the hard way to write down how she took stuff apart, so she could put it back together again.
When she decided to go back to work after the girls were in school, she took a part-time job. She enjoyed it, but when she realized she wanted to head in another direction, she started her own business. She kept the part-time job but also had the energy for her own business as well as be a mom and a huge help to El Carmelo school. She was truly tireless.
She was also so creative. She made the most amazing costumes for the girls; I remember one costume was a magic mirror; another was an alligator head. They looked like a costume shop had made them, and when I told her how great they were, she would just smile and say that she had fun doing it. She hosted art camp at her house and put on plays and fashion shows with the neighborhood children.
I think what inspired me most about Ana Maria is that she never gave up and she only saw the potential in people and things. I never saw her get discouraged, and I think that is truly amazing and awe inspiring. She believed in herself and the people around her, and she lived her life with grace, humor, and kindness. She opened her heart and her home to anyone who needed her. She was truly the best mother, sister, daughter, aunt, and friend that anyone could ever ask for.
I am devastated by this loss, as I am sure you all are. What brings me a little peace is to think of what she would want. I can picture her telling me to get up, get moving, and focus on the positive. She would want us to celebrate her life and to treasure what we have right now, which is each other. Most of all, I don’t think she would want us to be sad for long. She would want us to be at peace. I think of that when I think of her. Ana was also a very spiritual person, and she believed in angels. I truly feel like she is with me now, and that helps as well. When I see how many people she touched, I am grateful that I had her in my life. She will always be a part of me, and I think a part of you.
Thank you.
Ana, I am trying to listen to you, in my heart. But it is so hard. I think of you all every single day. I love you.
Dear Ana Maria, Robert, Sam, and Nica,
It’s very regrettable and it’s still hard for me to believe that you are no longer physically with us. They were few, the moments that I was able to share with all of you. I will always remember how optimistic and positive you were, and above all else that lovely happiness reflected in your faces, along with that immense drive to live life to the fullest every day. We are left with a great emptiness inside. Your presence still remains, and always will in the Palo Alto neighborhood. I know well that you are watchful and take care of us, just like you all are in our thoughts and in our prayers.
Love,
Jenny Beltran.
Ana Maria,
Your bday is coming up and I’m thinking of you and missing you. I am so lucky to have know you and I have learned alot from you over the years. Glad we had our time together.
Blessings to all ,
Quynh
Happy Birthday Ana Maria! Missing you…